11 Ways To Make Great Friends As An Introvert

Scientists don’t know for sure if there’s a cause for introversion or extroversion. What they do know is the brains of the two personality types work a little differently from each other. Researchers have found that introverts have a higher blood flow to their frontal lobe than extroverts do.

Or it might be my phone, which I’ll pick up and pretend to have an intense amount of interest in. (I’m just trying to hide behind it.) Even though the phone is generally not an introvert’s friend, it is in this case. The unfortunate thing about introverts is that most people tend to have the wrong perception of them. Introverts are often labeled by other individuals like this and such without knowing the truth. If you want to be friends with an introvert, you will need to know the following myths so you can approach them accordingly. But for someone who’s really introverted, the idea of going to a giant event can be really daunting,” Fanny Tristan, LCSW, a psychotherapist and founder of Restority Space in New York City, tells SELF.

What Introverts Look For In Friendships

Being a friendly introvert can be quite a balancing act. On one hand, you have the need to socialize and interact with people, like-minded or not; on the other hand, you also crave moments of solitude that allow you to recharge. With that last point being said, try not to be the person who never says yes (this will eventually lead to fewer and fewer invites).

Plus, one-on-one, it’s easier to have a meaningful conversation. Group talk tends to revolve around “safe” topics like weekend plans or silly banter. Introverts would rather dive deep, share big ideas, and talk authentically about topics that actually matter.

Rules You Must Follow If You’re Friends With An Introvert

” Or worse, “What if he gets to know me better and doesn’t like who I am? ” The process of making new friends can fill anyone with self-doubt — even the most confident among us. And if you’re an introvert who’s experienced significant rejection (as many of us have), you might feel like giving up altogether. If you’re an introvert who struggles thecharmerly.com to build the meaningful friendships you crave (and who doesn’t?), here are nine tips.

I’m a UK-based freelance writer who has a passion for women’s health, relationships & dating, and sustainability. My work has been featured in Get Me Giddy, The Date Mix, The Right Catch, and more. When I’m not writing, I’m usually reading, drinking tea, or catching up with my TV shows. One thing you should also consider is to question whether or not your introverted colleague even needs to be a part of your group in the first place. Are there people in your group you believe will get along with them well?

Making friends when you’re an adult is difficult, but if you consider the fact that I’m an introvert who works from home, sometimes it feels impossible. I know that I could join a club, or do some volunteering, or even reach out to some old friends to see if they’d like to meet up, but the idea of those things is completely overwhelming. Here are some reasons why I struggle to form close friendships as an introvert — and how I’m trying to change that. So while forming and maintaining friendships may follow a different rhythm for introverts, they are just as capable of having good friends and feeling fulfilled by these friendships.

how to be a good friend to an introvert

You already have a history together, which can make rekindling the friendship feel natural and comforting. Making friends as an introvert may feel daunting, but it doesn’t have to be. You can create meaningful connections with a few simple strategies while staying true to yourself. Here are ten practical ways to make friends, no matter how introverted you might be. However, as I explained in #1, introverts generally need time to mentally prepare to be “on” — even if we’re hanging out with a close friend who we’ve known for decades. Every introvert is different, but I prefer to be asked about social plans at least a day in advance.

  • Instead, they value one-on-one time and quality conversations.
  • Here are 6 tips, from one introvert to another, on how to be a better friend.
  • Here are some things I am doing in order to expand my friend circle and meet more people who “get” me.
  • When you are comfortable expressing your feelings and opinions in a respectful way, people will take notice of your own self confidence and be more likely to respect you and understand your point of view.

Introvert brains also react differently to dopamine than extrovert brains do. That’s a chemical that turns on the reward- and pleasure-seeking part of your brain. Introverts and extroverts have the same amount of the chemical, but extrovert brains get an excited buzz from their reward center. Introverts, on the other hand, tend to just feel run-down by it.

Kahnweiler says extroverts and introverts move through the world differently — and friendships can suffer when those differences clash. Enter social situations with optimism, expecting warmth and friendliness from others. This positive outlook can help reduce anxiety and make you more approachable. Believing in the best of others causes more open and genuine interactions. Turn your favorite hobbies into social opportunities by seeking out groups or classes that focus on those interests. Hobbies are a fantastic way to meet people who share your passions for ease of connecting on a deeper level.

Maybe that involves grabbing lunch with a handful of coworkers instead of joining a noisy happy hour. Or joining a book club, running group, or French class—an environment where you can meet people while doing something you actually enjoy. Introverts simply need alone time to recharge their mental energy. Introverts tend to nurture friendships for the long haul, staying connected with small gestures like sending interesting articles, remembered birthdays, and checking in. Many introverts bond with friends over common interests like books, technology, art, or gaming.

These days, I make an effort to share my thoughts spontaneously, but I think it will always be in my nature to hold back. Plus, in my perfect world, all of us would only speak when we have something of real value to say — not just empty words. Honestly, as an introvert, sometimes it doesn’t even dawn on me to verbalize what is running through my mind. Don’t pry, but do ask us how we are or what we think. In general, extroverts seem to have little trouble suddenly being “on,” meaning, it’s easy for them to pick up and don the social masks that we all wear. Many of them love — and even encourage — spontaneous socializing, because people time tends to give them energy, not drain it.